Do you have criminal record? No? Do I still need one? To get into Australia… This isn’t 1788 Queen Elizbeth
And just like that. *Poof* Weekend. Gone.
Join me and together we can rule the galaxy koala
Dad why do you work and do the housework and mom doesn’t? Because she promised she let me choose your name. Was it worth it? Of course it was Goku. Johnny Depp
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Reasons to date me: 1. no one will try to steal me from you 2. sometimes I’m funny Zach Galifianakis
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That laugh in exam when you know you’ve screwed up
Normal DNA vs black person’s DNA chain
Alright gentlemen we need a new design for the bus seat covers. Ugly drawing meme
After you get a free sample and you pretend you’re actually going to buy it
Bed: king size, queen size, prince size coffin
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