You say “all guys are the same”. Who the hell told you to try them all?
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No I’m not insulting you, I’m describing you Sherlock
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When he said he was going to give me a creampie I though he was buying me dessert
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Happy father’s day from your least disappointing child
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Happy father’s day to the guy who taught me that beer is a food group
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Plan for tomorrow get up, survive, back to bed
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April fools day is way too predictable, I pick my own random month and day and you’ll never see that coming
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Doing your taxes on April Fools day seems like a perfectly legitimate way to defraud the government
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