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After you get a free sample and you pretend you’re actually going to buy it
Me: why am I still single? Brain: you’re weird. Body: and you’re fat. Face: plus you’re pretty ugly. Food: I’m here for you
2 PM gonna go to bed early tonight, 10:30 PM here we go time to hit the hay, 2:30 AM ahh so male seahorses give birth
Weekend you get back here and let me love you Spongebob
Life before Google Maps toy carpet map
Happy endings, there are no happy endings, life is an uninterrupted series of humuliating failures Pinky and the Brain
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Bed: king size, queen size, prince size coffin
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Saying do I smell popcorn right after you fart so everybody takes a deep breath trolling