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Please be patient with the bartender, even a toilet can serve only one asshole at a time
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When she finishes a burrito all by herself. Pregnant woman
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T-rex hug me I’m trying
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Things I hate: 1. vandalism, 2. lists, 3. irony, 4. lists, 5. repetition, 6. inconsistency
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Nobody gets in, nobody gets out. Too short barrier
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I don’t always kill men but when I do I tell mama
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Choose a major you love and you’ll never work because that field probably isn’t hiring
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One day you might meet somebody you love as much as lunch
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