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Dammit, Jim. Tiger licking other tiger
Going to work when I first started my job vs now Shia Labeouf
Reasons to date me: 1. no one will try to steal me from you 2. sometimes I’m funny Zach Galifianakis
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That laugh in exam when you know you’ve screwed up
Normal DNA vs black person’s DNA chain
I hate when people where face masks in public. Like okay, we get it you’re a surgeon
Me looking at 0 notifications I’m receiving cause I’ve isolated myself and ruined all my realtionships with my friends, family and partners
Imagine if they had parent teacher conferences at college. Mom: how’s my son doing? Professor: I have never seen this man in my life