When you miss someone’s call but you ring right back seconds later and they don’t answer
College in 4 pictures Spongebob
When a giant boss appears there are two types of people: 1. please don’t kill me, 2. bring it on
Drinking alcohol for health reasons: when do you drink water? I’ve never been that sick grandma
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Man in a BMW painting third stripe on the road like his tracksuit
I think this dolphin has autism deer in the water
Give me coffee to change the things I can change and whiskey to accept the ones I cannot
When you’re about to ask your mum for something and you can already hear her complaining as you walk in the room
This tequila tastes like I’m not going to work tomorrow
When you marry the girl your homies said you had no chance with, feeling proud showing wedding ring