Me looking at 0 notifications I’m receiving cause I’ve isolated myself and ruined all my realtionships with my friends, family and partners
When you get to your first day of school and you can’t find your class or your locker or friends lost dog at school
Me: why am I still single? Brain: you’re weird. Body: and you’re fat. Face: plus you’re pretty ugly. Food: I’m here for you
Happy endings, there are no happy endings, life is an uninterrupted series of humuliating failures Pinky and the Brain
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I think I’m having a midlife crisis. You’re 24. I might die at 48
He’s 104 years old, what’s your excuse? He had more time to train old running man
The world’s oldest dog passed away at the age of 30 RIP Maggie
Have you ever bulshitted on an essay so hard that you basically laugh after every sentence you write?