I found someone else I’m leaving you, what does he have that I don’t have? electric toothbrush
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People holding hands, me holding fridge door
Single bells, single all the way oh what fun it is to watch those couples fight all day
When you hit it and already know you gonna peace out first thing in the morning cyclist blanket
Good way to get to know your date woman: ask about her first pet, favourite movie, mom’s maiden name. Then login and read all their shit
Wow honey the house is so clean, was the internet down today?
When you’re about to pull out and she knows you’ve got money elephant alligator
Daddy i want to marry, first say sorry, now you are ready when you learn to say sorry without any reason you can marry
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