So how’s parenting going? Kide puked vomited threw up on mother’s head fail
Your baby is cute, how old is it? She’s 34 weeks old, do you have time? Sure, it’s 972 minutes past midnight
My son was upset about his graze so I turned him into his hero adolf hitler sign on forehead
Kid reaching for the stars: I want to be Michael Jordan when I grow up, to achieve it I need to: 1. get bigger, 2. shave my head, 3. be black
Me: your shoes are on the wrong feet. 4 year old: I don’t have any other feet. Me: fair enough
Dad sing me a song from your generation. OK, *clears throat* ONE PUNCH
12 year old kids suffering for love, at that age I wanted to be a Supersaiyajin Dragon Ball
Human brain isn’t fully functional for learning until after 10 AM, science has proved that schools begin way too early