When I offer to wash your back all you have to say is yes or no, not all this “who are you, and how did you get in here?” nonsense
Therapist: what’s wrong? He’s insane, he shows his muscles to avoid problems. You know what else is insane? *starts unbuttoning shirt*
Typical catholic, typical muslim, typical atheist – science vs religion
Pizza order special instructions: send your cutest delivery boy. Dog delivering pizza
The combination of the colors red and yellow make people hungry Burger King McDonald’s Pizza Hut USSR Soviet Russia
Me opening up to someone second lid below can meme
Food lines in Venezuela prove socialism is just like Disneyland
Thank you for calling Apple tech support LGBT men dressed all in white
Girl on a first tinder date starting pack: knife hidden in a pencil, comb & lipstick
When someone tries to hurt your feelings but you’re dead inside and haven’t been able to feel for years Skeletor