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Yoda gets hit in the nuts, every other guy in a 1000 lightyear radius huh

Quentin Tarantino me: I can’t wait for my day off, me on my day off: doing nothing

Me: wins the lottery, my ex I miss you, my dad coming back with milk after 6 years, the rest of the family saying we won

When you say you’re not going out and you meet the person you’ve lied to Awkward Retriever

What I do when I break something? Fix it, tell somebody that I broke it, fix it just enough so that the next person to use it thinks they broke it graph

Told him it was me or his BMW E60 M5. Couldn’t hear him over his V10

Image too long, click to expand...

Inflation, what inflation? A pack of ground beef is the same price as last month small tiny

Subaru I can tell your exhaust is illegal from here policeman

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