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Will we find intelligent life on Earth? Who needs oil I ride the bus. The search continues

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He’s like twenty six and still watches cartoons you’re like sixteen and pregnant

What happens when I tell people I’m colorblind: that’s cool points at object what color is this graph

Peter Pan was an angel that held kid’s hands when on their way to heaven (Neverland) that’s why they never grew up all those kids were dead. Boom childhood ruined

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It doesn’t matter if you’re pretty plain tall or short it matters what’s inside fridge

When they say it ain’t an addiction and 5 days later they be like I can’t hold it

Cristiano Ronaldo with a girl I’m so poor that I don’t even know what they’re in

Parents: we want grandkids, me: the best I can do is not killing myself

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