Happy mothers day baby who’s this this was my wife’s number when she was alive
When autocorrect hits you with holy shot basketball
One of those numbers is mine one is my dads good luck tinder
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People who are scared to double text, not me: I’ll send 16 text, 8 twitter DMs, 5 voicemails, poke on facebook and write them a letter
Just got iOS8 swiftkey is awesome when’s Android getting it? 4 years ago
Mom don’t freak out but I’m in the hospital Jeremy you have been doctor for 8 years now please stop starting every phone conversation we have with that
You’re vegan? Yep. I don’t date vegans, sorry
When you’re about to send a risky drunken text and you know it will ruin your life but you do it anyway