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Is this heaven? No, it’s Iowa, travel safely. Street sign
Me in a job interview. Talents: sleeping
When you actually treat her with respect she disappears
*Hits blunt* If tomb is pronounced toom, and womb woom, why isn’t bomb pronounced boom?
90% percent of relationship is figuring out where to eat
When your phone dies in public and you dont know what to do with yourself sad monkey
Immature is a word that boring people use to describe fun people Will Ferrel quote
When people ask me how life is going: fallen off the stairs ladder
Poem about me: I hate people, I wish I was drunk. The end
For every cigarette you smoke God takes hour away from your life and gives it to Keith Richards