Sorry I can’t go out tonight I have an essay to write not that I’m going to write the essay tonight but I need to devote a certain amount of time to not doing an essay before I actually do it
Being an introvert at a party hey how are you? Did you know humans shed 40 pounds of skin cells in their lifetime game over
I need to stop drinking iPhone cut in half fail
If you’re thin you’re not coming in only because you are blocking the door you whale
When you hit that last cup in beer pong
What’s up ladies I’m single and ready to stand around awkwardly
When girls take selfies at the club pug
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Just because you can’t dance doesn’t mean you shouldn’t dance alcohol