Professor: 1 out of every 5 of you will develop an anxiety disorder. Me looking at my row: I gotchu fam
The test came back you’re obese, yeah it runs in my family, no one runs in your family doctor trolling
Drinking alcohol for health reasons: when do you drink water? I’ve never been that sick grandma
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Picking a president to vote for this term is like picking the STD that I’d be the most okay with having
When all of your knuckles crack except one so you have to try and convince yourself to be a sensible human being and resist the urge to break your own finger
Joey doctor: Date of birth? November 1968. Age? Can’t you figure that out from my date of birth? I’m a doctor not a mathematician
What happens when I run: lungs heart let us go you said ribs were to protect us
The different types of cancer EU European Union
Autism spectrum people are over represented in research science, but that means autism causes vaccines
McDonalds fries Marlboro cigarettes same shit