Your girlfriend will take 2 hours to get ready but if you don’t have your shoes on when she’s ready you’re the problem
When you push a pull door and the person behind you says “you need to pull”. Aye cheers lad sure next plan was to start lifting from the bottom
Me: I gotta focus on this. Brain: ladies and gentlemen, this is mambo number five. Me: please
Profile picture vs tagged photo fat dog
When you have a lot to do but you’re spending your time taking an online quiz to see what flavor potato chip you are cat
Secured tire but stolen rest of the car fail
Me vs Monday face inside a canon
Grandpa said your generation relies too much on technology so I unplugged his life support