Pre Tinder days when you didn’t say a word to your crush at school but you’d spit pure fire at night
We’ve got Pepsi instead of Coke, is that OK? I don’t know, is Monopoly money OK? In a restaurant
4000 years later and we’re back to the same language hieroglyphs emoticons
My dick is so hard. To find. Trolling word play
Princess Leia Darth Vader I don’t like the idea of you dating a smuggler, well let’s ask mom what she thinks, oh wait… That’s, it go to your room, my room was on Alderaan
Emergency question: where can I keep a baby goat I impulsively bought? This is a joke, right? This is Billy
When your drunk AF and someone is trying to have a deep conversation with you
Let’s hear a joke: “woman rights”. Tinder conversation feminist
This is his GF, who are you? Why are you texting him? I’m the girl that can make any girl go from GF to EX real quick, how was my brother’s flight?
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Interviewer: so what have you planned for the future? Me: lunch. No, like long term. Oh, dinner.